Sasuke the Ninja and Candy Mountain
by x-ClinicallyInsane-x
Summary: Naruto and Sakura force Sasuke to come with them to Candy Mountain! No pairings, one shot. Look out for the sequel: Sasuke the Unicorn and The Ramen King!


Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Charlie the Unicorn, or anything else mentioned in here.

(A/N) I really have no clue why I wrote this, I had nothing better to do...I guess.

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**Sasuke The Ninja and Candy Mountain**

Sasuke grumbled in his sleep. Two unexpected ninjas approached him, Naruto and Sakura.

"Heeeeey Sasuke, hey Sasukeeee, wake up!" Naruto poked the sleeping ninja.

"Yeah Sasuke, you silly sleepy head, wake uuuup!" Sakura said, also poking Sasuke.

"Ugh, oh god, its _you_, this had better be pretty freakin' important, is Konoha on fire?" Sasuke asked mumbling.

"Noooo Sasuke, we found a map to candy mountaaaaaiiiin, candy mountain, Sasuke." Naruto explained.

"Yeah Sasuke, we're going to candy mountaaaaiiin, come with us Sasukeeeee!" Sakura squealed.

"Yeah Sasuke, it'll be an adveeeeeenture, we're going on an adventure Sasukeeeee." Naruto spoke.

"Yeah, candy mountain, right, I'm just gonna, you know, go back to sleep now." Sasuke mumbled, putting his head back down onto his bed. Naruto was not going to allow this; he got up onto the bead and began to jump on Sasuke's exposed stomach.

"Nooooo Sasuke, you have to come with us to candy mountain!" Naruto continued to bounce on the raven's stomach.

"Yeah Sasuke, candy mountain. It's a land of sweets and joy…. and joyness." Sakura said, holding her hands together.

"Pease stop bouncing on me, Naruto." Sasuke grumbled. Naruto ignored the ninja and continued to jump.

"Caaaaandyyyyy mooooouuuuuntaaaaaiiiiin, Sasuke, Candy mountain." He said gleefully.

"Yeas, Sasuke, come with us to candy mountain." Sakura said, waving her head back and forth.

"Okay! Fine! I'll go with you to candy mountain. God." Sasuke yelled, suddenly getting up, dropping Naruto onto the ground.

---

"La la la la, alal lal" Sakura and Naruto held hands and skipped, leading Sasuke to the 'candy mountain'.

"Enough with the singing already!" Sasuke yelled.

"Our first stop is over there Sasuke" Naruto pointed to a large reptilian thing that was lying in the clearing.

"Oh god, what is that?" Sasuke asked, taking a step backwards.

"It's a Leopleuradon Sasuke." Naruto said in a scary, mystical voice.

"A _magical _Leopleuradon." Sakura added.

"It's gonna guide our way to candy mountain." Naruto commented.

"Alright, guys, you _do _know that there' no _real _candy mountain, right?" Sasuke asked, a little worried.

"Shun the non-believer…" Naruto whispered.

"Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnn" Sakura added ominously.

"Right…" Sasuke said, rolling his eyes. Right then the 'Leopleuradon' let out a long, glass-shattering screech.

"It has spoken." Naruto nodded his head in a Zen-like way.

"It has told us the waaaaay." Sakura added, also nodding.

"It didn't say anything." Sasuke yelled, following the duo out of the clearing, taking a nervous glance at the 'Leopleuradon' before hurrying.

---

"It's just over this bridge, Sasuke." Naruto yelled back to the ninja.

"This _magical _bridge of hope and of wonder." Sakura added, smiling.

"Is anyone else getting, like, covered in splinters, honestly, guys, I don't think we should be on this thing." Sasuke growled, looking down.

"Saaaaasuuuuuukeeeee Saaaaasuuuuuukeeeee Saaaaasuuuuuukeeeee Saaaaasuuu-" Sakura spoke. Sasuke cut her off.

"I'm right here, what do you want?" Sasuke yelled.

"We're on a bridge Saaaasuuuukeeee!" Sakura exclaimed.

---

"We're here!" Sakura shouted, looking up proudly at the mountain, donning the words 'Candy Mountain'.

"Well, what do you know, there really _is _a candy mountain…" Sasuke muttered.

"Candy mountain, candy mountain, you fill me up with such sweet and sugary goodness!" Naruto sang and danced, then stopped and turned to Sasuke with an expecting grin on his face.

"Go inside the cave, Sasuke." Sakura said, pushing the ninja forward a bit.

"Yeah Sasuke, go inside the cave, magical wonders the behold when you enter." Naruto said, nodding very Zen-like.

"Yeah, thanks, but no thanks, I'll stay out here." Sasuke said, taking a back step.

"Oh, but you _have _you enter the candy mountain cave, Sasuke!" Sakura pleaded, just then the word 'candy' on the sign jumped off of the mountain and began to sing and dance.

"Oh when you're down and you're looking for some cheering up  
Then just head right on up to the candy mountain cave  
When you get inside you find yourself a cheery land  
Such a happy and joy filled and perky merry land  
They've got lollipops and gummy drops and candy things  
Oh so many things that will brighten up your day  
It's impossible to wear a frown in candy town  
It's the neck of lovely candy cave  
They've got jellybeans and coconut with little hats  
Candy rats, chocolate bats, it's a wonderland of sweets  
Buy the candy train to town and hear the candy band  
Candy bells, it's a treat, as they march across the land  
Cherry ribbon stream across the sky and to the ground  
Turn around, it astounds, it's a dancing candy treat  
In the candy cave imagination runs so free  
So now Charlie before you go into the cave"

The danced and swirled until all but the 'c' returned to it's right full place, then, when 'c' finally returned the whole word blew up.

"All right! I'll go into the freakin' candy cave! This had better be good." Sasuke stepped hesitantly into the cave entrance.

"Yaaaaaaay!!!" Sakura and Naruto cheered.

"Goodbye, Sasuke!" Naruto smiled and waved.

"Yeah, good bye Sasuke!" Sakura waved as well.

"Goodbye? What?" Sasuke began as the cave door closed. "Hey! What's going on here? Hello?" Sasuke could hear footsteps. "Who is that?" Then everything, not that it wasn't already, went dark.

---

Sasuke opened his eyes; he was back in his house. He looked around.

"What happened?" His eyes finally landed on his stomach where, there were stitches. "Oh god, they took my freakin' kidney!"

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Now really, If any of you want to see Sasuke become the Banana King you had better review, and fast. 'kay?


End file.
